I have insomnia. It really kind of sucks. But, as an upside, I have plenty of time to reread my entire journal archive. You know what I’ve found out? I’m a cynical bastard… or a comic genius, either one. You decide, as I have nothing better to do than quote myself:

Talking about the last Harry Potter movie:
what the fuck is the chamber of secrets? Yes, evil is inside it, yes it’s somewhere in the castle but WHY is it the “chamber of secrets?” It has nothing to do with secrets! Nothing. Unless you count the fact that no one knows where it is. That’s the only secret associated with it. If it was a chamber for secrets would you get some special knowledge from within it? At least, that’s what I would figure. But no, it might as well be called Cheers because the only thing evil is doing inside it is hanging out for a little while and having a beer in between snacking on students.

On eating hotdogs:
I would like to take a moment and send a big “fuck you” out to whatever ass-hat decided to stock a downtown gas station with horrible near-death causing hot-dogs.

On proper clothing care:
My pants are in the oven. Why? Because they were dirty, I washed them and I have no dryer. I’ve heard that putting clothes in the oven for a few minutes on a low setting will dry them a little. More than likely I’m just cooking my pant.

On proper darkroom procedures:
STILL waiting for the damn scanner. I hate freshmen that don’t have a clue. Maybe I should give them a clue-pon…. or a swift kick to the face. Why do you think?

On college administrations:
That should be a VERY interesting conversation. Beginning with the phrase “Now listen you ass-face” and ending with “no officer, I’m not giving you attitude.”

And… drum roll please… the winner for most completely incoherent yet funny as heck journal entry is….

Entry #797 – “Sleepy”

“You know whats cool about sleep deprivation? Nothing. Well, besides a near euphoric state in which nothing really bothers you and you’re not really “awake” but certainly not asleep. Either that or EVERYTHING bothers you and you try to kill the guy at the convenience store for not giving you your change fast enough. Point is that I’m rambling mindlessly because I got to sleep from 8am till 10am. Then I woke up, couldn’t sleep because it was sunny, etc etc. Then I went and paid the cable bill. It was $60. Fuck cable. Then I picked up my digital prints at PhotoMasters. They were free. The guys there know me and didn’t feel like charging me. They rock. Now I’m at the photo lab. I’m not awake, but I’m typing, which is odd because I didn’t think you could type while you were sleeping. But I’m making a go of it. Which probably explains the spelling errors. Not that it explains the spelling errors in any of my other posts, but hey, if you’ve got an excuse, you might as well use it. After this I’m going home to get Lauren and coming back downtown to pick up her car. Then I’m formatting a hard drive… again. Fuck my harddrive. Then I’m sleeping. Sleep is good. I need sleep. But that’s ok, it was worth it to help out Lauren. I know she appreciated it and I was glad to help. Yah me! Ok, class now, sleep later, stuff in between.”

And with that, I end my incoherency for yet another night. G’night everybody.